The Power of the Duct Tape!

 Duct tape fixes everything. At least my little brother can give his testimony about duct tape and well nobody is going to tell him different. Though this testament is slightly true it makes things look incredibly well lets just put in the term "ghetto."

 Yup and because of my brother fixing everything that ranges from folders to book to even his mustache problem and if you ask me I think this whole duct tape thing is getting a little out of hand. Although I think this I have recently used duct tape to fix something of my own that I broke.

 My headphones and only one side of the headphone broke off and it still worked so I decided to "fix" it. Why does fix have quotation marks do you ask. Well it's because I look extremely ridiculous while using them. One side is fine and the other hangs limp and sideways as the duct tape struggles to hold it up.

While it does look funky at least it works right? Well yeah I guess it works fine though I have found that I don't really enjoy looking like a hooligan in front of my siblings because wearing that monstrosity has made me the laughing stock of the family which isn't too different from before the interesting incident of my headphones, but it still makes me bristle with embarrassment. What also makes me bristle with embarrassment is when I lay in bed at night and all at once think about all of the dorky things that I've done.  And this is kind of how I feel after that.

 Yeah that's kind of it. Okay but first before you leave may I interest you in a book? Okay ready for all of the awesomeness that's going to blow your tiny human brain?

Okay I actually bought this book even though I usually don't spend my money on anything because I'm cheap, and I realized it was a bad investment, but not in a way that you might think I promise it's just that I read it in an hour. Yeah and lets just say I was an emotional wreck while reading this terrific book. I sobbed and sobbed even though it wasn't remotely sad. Maybe there's something wrong with me. Ha that was a funny because I already know there's a lot of things wrong with me. Anyway it's amazing. Really great and if you ask me I like Realm better. He made me cry. If you don't know what I'm referring to then you definitely have to read this book. Okay that is all.

Smarty Pants.

 Although some of my experiences with boys are really disgusting or so embarrassing that I have blocked it (or have tried to) I actually still like some of them. Now some are real pigs, and I'm not talking just outside my church because even some in my church are druggies, perverts, and have taken other unruly paths of life though I still see these boys that are very gentlemanly, attractive, courteous, did I say attractive already because dang are some of those boys have gained some very physical blessings if you ask me.

 Okay now I'll stop being creepy. But truth be told that they're "bad seeds" everywhere the only thing that you need is a good judgment or if you don't have one surround yourself with others that might have better judgments on the guys you like or have a better insight. Okay I know what your thinking "Why should I listen to a girl who will never have a boyfriend." Well that is a good question and one that I will answer simply. You should not listen to me, but if you so choose to which you have so far then I will give you my opinion.

The sentence I just presented to you is the answer to your question and it's also something that Sharon Shinn would have written in one of her books. I have recently been reading her books and she is a master at words she writes in a style that amazes me and her books are originally made also making me like the main characters because they have a sense of style.

The girls that she writes about are all really smart and are cleaver and snappy. They have attitude and they can really think their way out of anything if they really wanted to and for her writing main characters like this I respect it because she writes fictionally, but it almost seems real with the way they act. I end up liking her any characters.

 Anyway back to the point Sharon Shinn makes all the love interests have comebacks that make me smile and it's just really enjoyable to read because of the fact that their relationship is built on worries on quarrels on real things while some relationships are just built on how good you kiss or how "hot" you are. Maybe it's just me but I think that just going into a store and seeing people making out is really disturbing though I have gotten used to it I shouldn't have to.

 Back to Sharon Shinn in her books the main characters are plain looking, but their intellect is what makes men interested in them. I find this really pleasant for reasons I can't explain. Thinking about boys that pick spouses because of their intellect makes me smile though I will never get a boyfriend in this way either because of the fact that I am quite a fool and decide not to make myself grow to my full potential because of my laziness.

 Still talking about the intelligence subject why do girls act dumb in front of boys? I've never understood this and to be honest I still don't. Okay you might get attention from the boys but it's bad attention. Wouldn't you rather have good attention than bad attention? I don't know I guess not.

 Now today I was talking to my older sister about Cleopatra. Because of my sister having to do a report on Egyptian gods she was reading about it, and it turns out Cleopatra wasn't gorgeous as movies and media have shown her. Cleopatra was actually described pretty much as plain looking. What caught the eyes of men was the way she presented her statements, arguments, and really everything she said was planned out. She presented herself as a smart woman that was able to do anything by herself. She could argue her points for hours and could silence a man by her quick sharp tongue. By doing this everyone saw her as stunning because of her remarkable brain. She was thought attractive because of her brain and everyone looked up to her because of it. This is very amazing and I actually like history because of stories like this. So with this I must pay thee a farewell.

"I want to be your best friend in the world" -Warner

 Going insane is in my genetics, so that's exactly what I'm doing at the second. Why? Because of this book that I've been craving to read for a while and never got the chance because my sister as much as I love her won't drive me to the library to pick it up. Well it keeps expiring and I keep having to put it on my hold list at the library. Let's just say I'm freaking out, but let me show you instead of telling you about this source.
 and 
 These two books have made me go insane mostly because I really want them. I've been reading quotes from the books and let's just say that I love Warner even more. Okay if you don't know who Warner is then you need to read these books because let's just say that he's the best bad guy ever and quite possibly the hottest too.

 I'm seriously swooning like a freaking Ryan Gosling fan, and nothing really makes me swoon mostly because of the fact that nobody says this kind of stuff to me so yeah. But really he says the nicest stuff to Juliet, (the main character with a lethal touch) and it just makes my heart burst into a million little pieces. Also for all of you Adam fans I will be hated by this sentence: I don't really like Adam. Okay now that that's over with now I can move on with my life. I've liked Warner from the beginning and even wanted him to get with Juliet from the start.

 He's a bad guy that finds his heart stolen by Juliet I mean he seriously would be lost without Juliet, and I really like that. Maybe I'm just a fourteen year old romantic, but I think these books are really good in the way that they take your heart right out of your chest and the books just stomp on your heart. That's not exactly how it works, but close enough. So I'm just thinking about the books twenty four seven and it's going to be this way until my mom takes me to the library which she should be doing today. What I've done yesterday is nothing, but reading the quotes and listening to music, and just really dying inside. Also I've been acting like the most dramatic person in the world. I've even started saying things like this:

 Yeah I'm special, but at least I'm not obsessing over Twilight. Though the books aren't really horrible not like the movies are. Okay I've said two things that I shouldn't have because now all of you are really going to hate me. Another book that's tearing me apart is one that I talk about constantly, and if you haven't read it yet then run to the nearest book store cause these might be the second greatest books ever is this.

Yeah you got it The Unbecoming of Mara Dyer. Great book and I still can't get over how hot, British, smart, blond, rich, oh and did I say British Noah Shaw is. Seriously he's one of the best characters I've ever read in a book and maybe that's just me, but I really love him even though I keep telling myself that he's a fictional character I seriously still love him and his awesomeness. Okay that's enough writing for one day. Goodbye people of the internet.
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Update people!
The third book of the Shatter Me series has come out and I'm extremely excited! It's everything I wanted and more! Enjoy! (You can tell I'm excited by all of the exclamation points I'm using!)

The House of Little Horrors!!

 She hears a scream and when she looks around the corner she sees the little face smiling a devilish grin making her childishly round face evil looking. Okay this is very dramatic and all, but that’s how I roll. You know how I do. Anyway this week I've decided to talk about horror stories, but these aren't the regular ones that makes you lay away at night wanting to cry to your mom. They’re the kind that makes you learn from others horrible experiences. It’s the curse of the little kids. Of course some people are like “Oh little kids they’re little angels they can do no wrong” and I’m sure their parents think this too, but when the babysitter arrives all crap hits the ceiling. I've recently heard some really bad ones, so sit back and read the horrors and enjoy or take notes ( WARNING this is overly dramatic as is everything on my blog and is suppose to be funny  please don’t get offended thank you!)

Having to babysit someone you don’t know is really unsettling and pretty horrible for three reasons. You don’t know what the little kid’s personality is which is sometimes sweet, but most of the time very naughty. Two is you don’t know what you’re going to get paid for putting up with the little hooligan’s shenanigans. The other problem is when the kid’s parents are going to show up and have to be a parent again. So having these three problems in mind you walk up to the door ready even eager to get this over with when the parents open the door and practically shove you inside the house and start running out to their car. While running out the mother decides to finally inform you that her kid thinks she’s possessed. Just having this processing in your mind and not knowing what the heck is going on you turn around and the girl is silently watching you. No hello just creepy little eyes staring at you. Yeah apparently the whole night was her putting the girl to bed the girl not saying a word and then getting up standing on the stairs and watching her when she was watching TV. The girl that informed me of this story said that it chilled her to the bone to see that little girl just watching her not saying a word the whole night and it freaked her so much that she was never desperate enough for money to ever babysit the family again.

 This story is from my life experience and obviously I’m not good with kids because for some reason they like to beat me up. Anyway yesterday I was babysitting a kid and we were watching the Muppet's movie when he decides to change it. Well he made that decision about seven times and finally I looked him in the face, and said “Look I’m not going to change the movie again so sit your arse down and watch this one.” Yeah I usually don’t get snippy with anyone that I babysit (mostly because I never babysit), but the lady wasn't paying me so technically it was “babysitting” and what I did was legal and stuff so it’s all good in the hood. But anyway the boy finally settles his butt down, and he starts picking his nose. I have bad experiences with nose pickers especially the ones that’s about to go to college and does the sacrament bread, but I won’t begin with that because it’s too much to write about. Anyway he wipes his boogers on the couch and I start reprimanding him and I help him wash his hands. After that I think it’s over, but he just starts to pick his nose again and he starts wiping it on the couch. I don’t even care by this point because at least he’s sitting down. Thirty minutes later he starts complaining on how hungry he is and after that he picks up his boogers that he put on the couch and he starts eating it. 
 
Yeah pretty gross I have other horror stories, but because of my lack of going out of the house it isn't from my own experiences. Though one of them involves a ten year old still breast feeding which is quite uncomfortable thing especially when the mom is talking about giving the kid a bottle when she's gone. That's really different just saying.

Church Dances (ugh I can see her ankles.)

 This Saturday is my first church dance...

 Yeah really exciting except these are the rules don't laugh at them they're made so we "can feel the spirit" while we're dancing to ghetto arse music (just kidding no songs that chases the spirit away. Yay!)

No t-shirts. No cuprees (ugh I can see her ankles what a slut.) Let us keep in mind that we need to feel the spirit not become Amish just saying I mean no tee shirts what a ridiculous rule. That's pretty much all I have to wear is jeans and a t-shirt, and I'm sure as heck know that I don't want to wear a freaking dress!

No "freak dancing" darn that was what I was going to do at a church dance anyway I mean why have a dance if you can't grind on a bunch of pimply boys? And plus "freak dancing" is the only kind of dancing I can do I mean I can twerk like a black girl, so why not show others what I got?

No loitering or "hanging out" in the halls of the church or the outside of it. It's like the people who makes the rules believe everyone my age are complete tards. Though on the other hand I know that I'm probably the only girl my age that really cares about vocabulary or books because all of the people I know my age are watching shows that hasn't been "in" a long time ago and obsessing over them (Doctor Who, Roswell, Monk, among many other shows.)

Anyway the point is all of these rules are suppose to keep us in check and they're really strict about the rules and having people follow them, but seriously do you really have to be so strict that you can't even wear t-shirts and cuprees I mean how ridiculous. I can't even fathom the reason to ban these things just saying. I will reason with what they call "freak dancing", but I think that's just kind of an unspoken rule at a dance no matter where you are. It's kind of like when you go to the pool the life guards or the rules shouldn't have to say:
                                   1.DO NOT POOP OR PEE IN THE POOL!!!!

 It's human nature to know that, that's really freaking gross even when you were a little kid you knew that, that's really vulgar, and a thing that you do in a toilet, and not in a pool where everyone gets water in their mouths whether they mean to get in in their mouths or not. Though I will say that I know some people who does it and did it when I was a little kid. And I will admit to doing it occasionally when I was a kid. Hey what did Hannah Montana say about not everyone being perfect? No judging!

Anyway back to the point which I guess is being church dances suck. Though I wrote about this before I will do it again just because everyone needs to be repetitive sometimes to get their point across. Being in a house with six children (about to be seven) I must have the patients to repeat most things (I know I'm just too awesome guys also I love you random citizen.)

 Anyways I was talking to a "friend" of mine, (let's keep in mind that I do have air quotes over the word friend and that I use friend as a loose phrase okay thanks for that clear up I'll just start up the story again), so what she said shocked me (but not really.) Apparently the boys are too "shy" to ask the girls to dance (I've told you this once, but again about getting my point across just saying.) Yeah if you're a boy reading this I am going to tell you this (this is top secret so keep it on the down low okay, great.)


GIRLS LIKE TO DANCE WITH BOYS DURING THE SLOW DANCES, AND IF YOU DON'T FREAKING ASK THE GIRLS TO DANCE THEN THEY GET REALLY PISSED AT ALL OF YOU AND THINK THAT YOU ARE "SHY", OR THAT YOU JUST WON'T GIVE THEM THE KIND OF DAY, (and some of you won't) BUT THE POINT IS BE ABLE TO ASK THAT GIRL TO DANCE. IF YOU THINK THEY'LL REJECT YOU THEN STILL ASK BECAUSE YOU NEVER KNOW!!!

 Okay now that I've gotten that out of my system I'm pretty happy. Also if a girl is really socially awkward just be a gentleman and ask them to dance anyway because again you never know.

Okay this last one and then I'll go. If a girl ask your toothbrush color do not I repeat do not try and be funny with her by saying these two things because it will traumatize her. "What's a toothbrush?" or "Oh I don't have a toothbrush." Just don't okay there's this girl I know and she got the first one and well she keeps talking about it. I would think it's funny, but she obviously didn't. If you're dealing with a girl who has a sense of humor then do it make that girl laugh have a crack at it, but if you're with one of those prissy girls just do yourself and the girl a favor and tell them what color that freaking toothbrush. And for the people who really don't have a toothbrush don't admit it just make up a color and be done with it.

Fruit Ninja

 I have a really bad temper if you guys didn't know. I don't mean your regular bad temper because mine is always bad I just have to tell myself to ignore it and walk away from the situation before someone (that someone not being me) goes to the hospital. Believe it or not when I'm mad I turn into the freaking hulk and despite the fact of me having noodily arms I can throw a good punch when I'm angry enough.

So I've found away to get around my anger issues, so one day I won't either be thrown in jail or thrown in an insane asylum because heaven knows I'm crazy when I get angry and I do the first thing that comes to mind which isn't exactly a good thing.

 In the past I usually acted on my anger which led to being punished and this, that, and the other kind of punishments that usually didn't whip me into shape. But I've found something instead of walking away listening to happy music and reading a semi happy book that turns out to kill one of the co. characters and make you sob like a baby, but what's not happy about that? Yeah this is what it is..

FRUIT, FRUIT, FRUIT, FRUIT, FRUIT, FRUIT, FRUIT, FRUIT, FRUIT, FRUIT, FRUIT, FRUIT!

 Yeah it's fruit everybody. I have taken a liking (and I kind of have a natural talent) for making fruit salads. I don't mean you're regular fruit salads I like to make the pieces so small that you have to use a microscope to see them and you can't even use your fork to pick them up. So if you pick it up with a spoon then you get all of the fruits and it tastes really awesome. I'm cool and when I get pissed off I just go and cut some fruit though nobody knows it yet that it's a sign that I'm mad at them, so they come into the kitchen to get some before I'm done and I enjoy everyone complements and that makes me happy again.

 Maybe I'm a weird fourteen year old girl to be doing this for my anger issues, but hey it's affective in making me happy again and that's all I wanted it to do in the first place, so all is good. But now since I have developed my skill in little knifes and strawberry cutting everybody wants my fruit salad and it's kind of cool for me I'm not going to lie. Anyway that's it, but my posts aren't good without me talking about some book, so (drum roll please) BAM!!

This book is so awesome and the cover's beautiful it's just overall a great storyline and the writing is magical and really pulls you in. I love this book!! Why are you still here show's over go home.

Being Lazy Like a Winner!!!

I've actually been doing things these last days and this is what I fell like right now.

Just thinking about doing anything exhausts me and that brings me to my highest degree of laziness, but I don't even care anymore. In these last few weeks I've done enough for the rest of my life, so now I'll just lay down on my bed and make a list for you because I have nothing better to do at five in the morning (with the exception of eating and my mom will probably hear me if I go downstairs and that won't be the greatest experience).

 So a couple of days ago I bowled and I was crappy at first and then I got better. After that we went to the movies and by that time I was ready to go home and take a nap, but instead of going back home we went to rock climb. Yeah lots of physical work and even thinking about doing it again just makes me groan. Anyway we did that and today my family and I are going to watch a magic show. I also prepped for my camp which is a week away.

I went on a bike ride and almost had a heart attack (stop singing that Demi Lavato song, and I know you are). I cleaned up the house (which got dirty again and I don't mean anything other than the floors because that's my job and they get so freaking dirty). Yeah but all in all I actually did something and well that's a change for me and I know some of you are like "well you should be proud of yourself and you're accomplishments", but seriously I don't care about accomplishments and that's kind of a bad thing. I feel like I am doing things in the future, so right now I can just be lazy, but on the other hand you can't be lazy if you're going anywhere in life.

 I was actually good at bowling, and just really everything I did in these past few weeks because I tried, but if I got too cocky I would get hit by the humble stick and mess up. Yeah that's the same with my cookies which are usually horrible, but on occasions I actually make them perfect and then I get too cocky and the next time I make them they turn out to be a epic fail.

I think this is God trying to keep me in check. Okay maybe I just mess up because I'm an idiot, but there's a little sliver of hope for that theory. So now I'm going to watch a dinosaur hunter show cause I do stuff with my life (cough, cough).